My Boring Life

Don't worry; this isn't a post where I'll lie and say that I'll start exercising to lose weight or save money or any of those tired resolutions we all come up with. I want to say that this is a revelation of sorts? I've come to the conclusion that I shouldn't hide what I really feel around anyone, whether it's online or in person. And that I should stop giving a damn if it offends people or make them look at me all weird. Just something personal that I've wanted to work on. I won't lie; I do want to start losing weight, getting back into the gym. If anything, for my health. September 2015, I found out that I was diabetic. I'm not on insulin and my fasting blood sugar is actually within range. My A1c fluctuates but not outrageously. I want to steer clear of taking insulin and in order for me to do that, I have to get off my ass and get myself active and better. Changing the way I eat is going to be a bitch. And it's something I never understoo...

Good morning. I should be going to sleep soon; although I physically went to bed around 10 last night, I really haven't closed my eyes. This morning, I showered with my husband for the first time in a while; usually, I'm still sleep while he gets ready for work. Anyway; after eating breakfast together, we had another talk about children, again. Lately, I've been getting a feeling that it might be a sign that I can't have children. It scares the crap outta me but i really believe that maybe I wouldn't survive childbirth and that's why I haven't gotten pregnant. I tend to get depressed a lot because the little friends that I do have, have children. I was there when my good friend had her twins, and I was named the godmother. I remember that same night, after we all came back from the hospital: I cried myself to sleep. When my friend, Rana, announced that she was pregnant, I cried. She was in the same boat as me; in her 30s with no children. So, don't get m...